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Wednesday, April 1, 2015

sersiouly

Hey kripp, do you remember when you consistently got 10-12 wins all the time? what happened to that? you sersiouly got terrible at this game, and you should feel bad, day in and day out you see more and more people leaving your stream and only stay for the spam, not for your gameplay anymore, its actually disgusting, eddy pasterino would not be proud

dear mr pie

Dear Mr. Pie, I feel like Lucian gets quite strong early on around level 2, call it a power-spike, if you will. Is there a place I could learn more about this phenomenon, and how to utilize it to its full potential?

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

american test

✓ tbSausageBiscuit ✓ tbQuesarito ✓ tbChickenBiscuit ✓ tbSausageBiscuit ✓ tbQuesarito ✓ tbChickenBiscuit ✓ tbSausageBiscuit ✓ tbQuesarito ✓ tbChickenBiscuit ✓ tbSausageBiscuit ✓ tbQuesarito ✓ tbChickenBiscuit AMERICAN TEST PASSED OpieOP.

Monday, March 30, 2015

loaf of bread

As Michael "imaqtpie" Santana sat shivering on the cold pavement, Lisha, who happened to be passing by, decided to share a loaf of bread with him. He wanted to share her kindness, and so he decided feeding in every game henceforth.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

hot grill

Recent studies show that about 10% of all Twitch users are female. That means for every 9 disgusting greasy nerds, there will be at least 1 hot grill. So look at the chat, pick a name, and start fapping. There's a 1 in 10 chance that it won't be gay

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

eminem kripp

Kripps balls are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, his opponent is missplaying already, thinking steady, he's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm yet salty to drop minions, but he keeps on forgetting what he drafted just now, the whole chat is so loud, he opens his mouth, and all that salt comes out, he's babyraging now, game's over WOW

look like a pencil

Hey Reynad! Nice to see you streaming again. I see you've decided you want to look like a pencil. Good for you man, follow your dreams. You'll be erasing your foes in no time.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

romanian coal mines

Kripparian, this is Papparian. Me and Grandpapparian are working to death in Romanian coal mines to pay for your Heartrock card packages. Mammarian has become prostituterino on streets of Moscow and must let Ruski swine pound her for potato money. Please send food, and preferably not pasta.

Monday, March 23, 2015

#spamfree

Guys, I'm a moderator. I want all spam to stop. This is causing alot of inner conflicts amongst all chat moderators. Alot of debates go on about which moderators deserve to retain their title and which deserve to descend. If you all kindly stop spamming this will resolve all conflict. Thank-you for the spam-free chat #spamfree

Friday, March 20, 2015

re-seeding friends

(◕‿◕✿) Hi Amaz, could you roleplay as a tournament organizer, but then get caught re-seeding your friends and pretend that your tournament is legit? Thanks (◕‿◕✿)

Thursday, March 19, 2015

no no no no

"No, no, no, no," said the speedrunner, as he realized his last-second mistake.Speedrunner ZFG holds the world record for beating The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time under the 100% speedrun condition, clocking in at four hours, 25 minutes, and 25 seconds. 100% of Ocarina of Time means tracking down and obtaining all health pieces, upgrades, etc.I swear that wasn't on purpose," he said. "My setup there is bomb, jump-slash, turn around, set bomb. I didn't press B. I pressed B too fast and it didn't register."

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

ballsack ritual

THANKS FOR TEACHING THE BALLSACK RITUAL AND SALTY CAWK SPAM TO YOUR CHAT, THIS ENSURED YOUR VICTORY IN THE POLL. THANK YOU, SENSEI, I'LL NEVER BETRAY YOU. I'LL FOLLOW YOUR TEACHINGS, I'LL TREAD IN YOUR FOOTSTEPS!

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

twitch chat examination team

Hello this is the Twitch Chat Examination Team here with anther experiment. We are testing how quickly a message typed into chat is copied and pasted by the mindless hordes. Please, if you're reading this, spread awareness for our cause.

Monday, March 16, 2015

trying to read spam

CAN YOU GUYS STOP TRYING TO HAVE A MEANINGFUL, CONSTRUCTIVE DISCUSSION IN THIS CHAT? I'M TRYING TO READ THE SPAM.

Friday, March 13, 2015

99 boogers

I got 99 boogers and i just ate one... if your havin food problems i feel bad for you son cause i got 99 boogers and i just ate one..i got a stuffy nose and some baggy clothes....i got stupid hair with asian hoe.....keep talkin shit and ill play some moar, my views just dropped now i play hardcoaw....just lost my barb im blamin dissconnect, alkaizer passed me up time to ban his twitch...got my whole clan yeah they down to ride..call me tom cruise

ruining my life

Hey Kripp thanks for ruining my life as*hole. I was normal guy, living simple life. Then I saw your video about beting. What could go wrong if Kripp says I can't lose? Well, everthing. Now I find myself to bet on some random dongers in this stupid rng game. I even sell my body to random strangers to bet more. Thanks Kripp!

Thursday, March 12, 2015

ATTENTION

******ATTENTION ***** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) This chat has is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors. Please type forsen W (no space), into your chat box to verify yourself as a follower of forsen. Those who do not verify themselves and are caught posting in this chat will be persecuted to the fullest extent of the law ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

SECURITY ALERT

SECURITY ALERT: A Romanian man, roughly 6'5", skeleton thin, with black hair and scraggly beard has been seen riding the NYC Sub train and violently "Bro-Fisting" passengers. He's accompanied by a short Asian man dressed as Hitler who reputedly cuts out the tongue of anyone who refuses to give him $5. Exercise caution and stay way from the Subs!

verbally molesting

Mr. Michael "imaqtpie" Santana, I am from the Supports Abused by Adc Foundation, and i would like to point out that you are guilty of verbally molesting all of your last supports. Please no "copy pasta", this is a serious warning.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

cattarian here

Hey guys how's it going Catarrian here. Just another chill day of being deceased. I'm feeling a little Dead ☑ RIP ☑ Gone ☑ and gonna end the stream early because i'm not alive any more

online card game

ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ-ᴀɢᴇᴅ ᴍᴀɴ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴄʜɪʟᴅʀᴇɴ ʙᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ᴀɴ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ ᴄᴀʀᴅ ɢᴀᴍᴇ. ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴘᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ $4.99 ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ sᴏ. ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄᴏɴsɪᴅᴇʀ ᴘᴜᴛᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ɪɴ ᴘᴇʀsᴘᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʙɪɢ ʙᴀʙʏ.

Monday, March 9, 2015

zoosexual

I am a degree 6 Zoosexual, sexually and emotionally attracted to Tyrannosaurs and nothing else. Women don't even do it for me. I am cursed to live my life in the misery that my most powerful emotional fantasies will never be even close to coming true. Life is like hell to me. I will never know true love.

fall off chair

@Imaqtpie I started watching your stream and my pussy gets so wet i fall off my chair, it tried to sit on a tortilla to soak everything out but it never works. What should i do? I want to watch the stream but i don't want my basement to flood.

Friday, March 6, 2015

offered sex

I was offered sex today, with a 21 year old girl. In exchange for that, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner to my friends. Of course I declined because I am a person of high moral standards with a strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available scented with lemon or vanilla.

riot DMCA

Dear Phreak, this is an official DMCA notice issued by Riot Games. If you wish to keep your job we advise you to stop rebroadcasting official LCK content immediately. We at Riot Games care about the safety and emotions of our professional players. It has been brought to our attention that you are harassing our Korean players. You have been warned