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Thursday, February 11, 2016

amaz selfie

You walk up to Reynad at Blizzcon, he doesn't seem busy. You ask him if you can have a selfie, he's polite and says yes, it's always nice to meet a fan. The next day you get home and there's a rock through the window with a note wrapped around it. "I'll pay you double what he gives you if you come take a selfie with me. Thanks - Amaz"

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

tossed you a follow

Hi man, nice to meet you! This channel seems really cool and I tossed you a follow because I would love to come back and watch another time, thanks for being you bud!

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

deck doctor

Reynad is backstage of the Red Bull event with Archon Zalae. Reynad leans into Zalae's ear and whispers "I know youre the deck doctor on stream, but I want you to be my dick doctor tonight." Zalae takes him to the back and gives him the pleasure he desires. Reynad splurges loads and Zalae says "That was quick. Must have been like 30 seconds." Reynad says "No baby, 29 for sure."

Thursday, February 4, 2016

mfn game

We back once a mfn gain ResidentSleeper Time to feed my *** of in solo q ResidentSleeper Time for the Godyr D Gates ResidentSleeper Now Ill play some Voli thunderstruck ResidentSleeper Time for H1Z1 ResidentSleeper I shot that guy 9 times ResidentSleeper Ill put you in the dirt ResidentSleeper Thanks for the 5 bones ResidentSleeper Im tired streams over ResidentSleeper

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

reaction videos

Hello Kripp This is the FineBros we see you have a dog reaction posted on your stream and we see you did not apply for a license to show the proper reactions. We are suing you for a small loan of 1 million dollars. Thank you and please no more reactions..

Monday, February 1, 2016

pupparian

Welcome to your new home,” says the Kripp as he carries the Pupparrian in his bony arms. The puppy leaps from his uncomfortable position onto the ground and begins to run around. Soon, he grows tired and goes to bed. That night, a ghostly cat visits the Pupparrian in his sleep. “Flee,” warns the cat, “The Kripp plans on eating you, as he once ate me.” WutFace

Friday, January 29, 2016

fat americans

I really don't see what terrorism have to do with 9/11, it's quite obvious an example that airplanes simply cannot handle the combined weight of several americans. When a single american takes up most of the seats in a row it is quite obvious that putting several of them on a plane is a guaranteed flight risk, not to mention their mobility scooters in the luggage..

Thursday, January 28, 2016

romanian village

In Romanian village there is very little water. Papparian is thirsty and asks Kripparian to get some water for him from the water tap 2 miles away. Kripp decides to go to the store first. A few hours later Kripp brings Papparian his water, only to find Papparian has had a heat stroke. With his dying breath, Papparian asks "My son, why did you tap last?"

Monday, January 25, 2016

maximus kappacus spamicus

<:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ My name is Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Armies of the Twitch, General of the Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor Kripparrian. Father to a banned son, and husband to a banned wife. I will slay all moderinos, whether in this chat or the next. <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ

Friday, January 22, 2016

great thinkers

Octavian "Kripparian" Morosan is one of the great economic professors of the 21st century. Morosan was the first of the Great Thinkers to reject the institution known as "college". Morosan would go on to redefine economics. He singlehandedly brought an end to the Greater Oil Crisis of 2045, establishing world peace for hundreds of years to come. His lesser achievements include outlawing meat and animal cruelty.

Thursday, January 21, 2016

pig sticker

SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH YOUR DUMB FUCKING QUESTIONS ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW IS KRIPP LOVES PIG STICKER BECAUSE IT SQUEALS BECAUSE HE MISSES BACON krippO

Monday, January 18, 2016

thanks for the present

"Thanks for the Christmas present." Reynad said to Frodan. "You liked the beer then?" Replied Frodan. "No man, it tasted like shitty soda with the aftertaste of a shot of vodka." Spat Reynad. "Oh, I'm sorry." Wept Frodan. "It's cool, also, you're fired." Said Reynad, putting on his shades and walking away.

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

portal

Kripp sits at his PC for another grueling 4 hour stream. “Hey guys, time complain that my opponent has cards!” he says. Suddenly, a portal opens, and a shotgun wielding Reckful appears. As Kripp panics, Reckful shoots. Surprised that he’s alive, Kripp turns around. On the ground is a quickly reforming Massan-1000 MrDestructoid “Come with me if you want to stream,” says Reckful.

Tuesday, January 12, 2016

hello pals

Hello pals sorry for bad england. I come on website to speak to girl from village. Is place where she can speak without state see because message move fast. I talk with her once month. Cost twenty fennix money for half hour internet to talk. I want thank chat for many message, help cover our trail.

Thursday, January 7, 2016

instincts

You notice a wall of text in twitch chat and your hand instinctively goes to the mouse. You scroll up to stop the chat elevator and read the pasta, indulging in its delights... You soon realize that this pasta conveys no information nor is particularly witty or funny. Nevertheless, you drag your mouse across, hit Ctrl+C, then Ctrl+V and press Enter

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

kripp illuminati

Kripparian's true name is Octavian. Octavian is derived from the Latin word for 8. Latin was the language of Rome. Rome fell to Barbarians. Kripp played a Barbarian. Barbarian is 9 letters. Kripparrian is 11 letters. 9/11. Kripparrian is deIlluminati Confirmed.

Monday, January 4, 2016

a man has a skin

im tired of seeing RACIST and HOMOPHOBIC things into this chat. its disgusting. just because a man has a skin or a way of do sex with others that is not the way you like. you will say rude things to him? you DONT EVEN KNOW THIS MAN! how dare you? CLEAN UP THIS CHAT NOW OR IM LEAVE. god bless

Sunday, January 3, 2016

spam in harmony

I have a dream that one day Plebs and Subs will Spam together in harmony. Plebs should be judged not by the frequency of their spam, but the quality of their copypasta! So plebs and subs alike copypasta this for the greater good!

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

hobo

@Imaqtpie, hey qt i got kicked out of my parent's house and i need a place to crash. I figured that since you were a hobo before you could help a brother out. Do you mind if I stay with you for a couple weeks while I get back up on my feet? (no copy pasto)

Monday, December 21, 2015

let her win

Hello Reynad. My grandmother Nancy is currently in hospice. This will probably be my last Christmas with her, so I've been spending a lot of time with her. She was curious what game I was always playing, so I let her play Hearthstone for a bit. Please let her win before she has to pass Reynad, thank you

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

bad mods

Seriously, mods. I blame you for the state of this sub. You are more concerned with making memes yourselves than stopping this bullshit from hitting the front page. You spend all your energy on being first to post a patch, making guides so bad that the devs are forced to remove depth from the game and making videos all for your self-image. I blame the mods for the decline of this community.

Monday, December 14, 2015

other accounts

I like how imaqtpie doesnt realize that all his viewers are me on different accounts. Dont believe me? watch me post this on my other account

Thursday, December 10, 2015

useless

Everyday my father beats me. He calls me useless and says he wishes I had never been born. At school the teachers laugh at me behind my back and say I'm useless too. My only solace is Kripp's stream. When I watch Kripp, I feel like I have a friend. But today Kripp thinks I am useless too

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

vampire kripp

Lord Octavian Vampparrian created a strategy built around drinking the blood of others through his fangs. Fighting for control of the night by having no reflection, avoiding garlic, and the sun until he finds a suitable meal. The hunt for human blood makes the act more fun and compelling. Though not particularly fun or interactive.

Thursday, December 3, 2015

tempo storm heroin

@reynad27, I saved so much from Tempo Storm that I was able to afford to try heroin for the first time. Now I live by a dumpster in an alley. I just killed a passer-by so I could steal their phone to send you this message. Tempo storm ruined my life. FeelsBadMan .